Trade your Gouda for Glossier.
Homebound and craving comfort, we’re all turning to any peace of mind we can salvage, wherever the source. Well, when your Netflix queue has emptied and your patience for puzzles waned, let me introduce you to my self-isolation sedative: charcuterie videos.
Those who have surrendered themselves to TikTok know that charcuterie is an oddly popular genre of content. The videos, which I blame my sister for inserting into my life during a vulnerable period, garner millions of views and involve a person methodically placing cheese, meat, fruit, and the occasional chocolate-covered pretzel into an artful arrangement on a serving board.
But my ultimate salvation arrived when I stumbled upon unchartered territory in the charcuterie space: a beauty product board. Instead of sliced prosciutto, I spotted beauty blenders. In the place of jam, a sparkly serum. Los Angeles-based cosmetics company ColourPop assembled the unconventional spread, which instantly soothed and intrigued me. (The video’s more than 400,000 views tell me I’m not alone.)
A makeup charcuterie board anyone? #colourpop #colourpopme #charcuterieboard #makeup #foryou #foodboard #xyzcba
♬ original sound – colourpopco
There’s something about these chaotic times where the order of charBEAUTerie boards (I’ve had a lot of free time), provide relief. They offer structure, symmetry, and a chance to ogle that Fenty Beauty palette I’ve been eyeing. Each moisturizer, brush, and lip tint finds its place even if the disparate parts don’t seem like they would fit.
Makeup board 🥰 Had to set with some @morpheofficial setting spray of course 🤩#morphe #morphebrushes #makeup #fyp #fypage
♬ original sound – ssaaggei
Food board but make it skincare #foodboard #yummy #skincare #facemask #kbeauty #fyp #foryou #ohk
♬ Yummy – Justin Bieber
It makes sense that the comfort of charcuterie would translate to cosmetics. The same indulgent #selfcare feelings inspired by a creamy brie and glass of red can be achieved by slathering on a face mask or trying a new lip matte. I’ve been devouring this content as I would a cheese assortment, but only a few brave pioneers have redefined what belongs on a charcuterie board.
View this post on Instagram
A post shared by Diane Buzzetta (@dianebuzzetta) on Nov 29, 2019 at 1:44pm PST
So consider this my slightly unhinged, mid-isolation plea: MAKE MORE BEAUTY CHARCUTERIE CONTENT. Seriously, stroll from your couch and over to your makeup supply. Assess the damage, grab a serving platter, and start organizing. You’ll entertain yourself, hone your charcuterie skills for the inevitable post-pandemic party, and assert control over an aspect of your life once more. (Your board, your rules.) Earlier this month, Instagram user @myghosthost even channeled her anxiety into a board of wellness supplies:
View this post on Instagram
I took a moment from nervously rocking in the corner in the fetal position to do the only thing that calms my nerves. Created a board. ❤️STAY STRONG EVERYONE. WE’LL GET THROUGH THIS ❤️. SENDING EVERYONE LOVE 😌. #dowhatyoulove #board #staystrong #staypositive #wellgetthroughthis #cheflife #chef #picoftheday #pictureoftheday #foodie #stayhealthy #cheeseboard #grazing #purell #quarentine #itscoronatime #washyourhands #losangeles #pacificpalisades #health #costco #wellness #love #charcuterie #life #2020 #community #food #chefsofinstagram #grazingplatter @purellbrand @costco @dial @emergenc @gaiaherbs @naturesbounty
A post shared by Orly Ely-My Ghost Host 👻 (@myghosthost) on Mar 14, 2020 at 12:29pm PDT
For now, I’ll be wedging foundation sponges in between an eyeshadow palette and two tubes of mascara, willing the weight of the world to lessen just a smidge.
Below, how to assemble your own appetizer platter of cosmetic therapy:
A Guide to Your CharBEAUTERIE Board
Marble & Copper Footed Cheese Board
Behold, a chic way to display your beauty charcuterie.
Marble & Copper Dip Bowl
Pour serums, creams, and lotions into these stylish dishes.
Real Techniques Miracle Complexion Sponges
Pay homage to the cheese wedge and fill empty space on your board with these look-alike sponges.
Acrylic Dual Canister Set
A side dish of applicators will be necessary for group use.